Captain Obvious to the Rescue, Robert Tracinski
Thu Dec 7, 9:30 AM ET
Copyright © 2006 RealClearPolitics


In my student days back at the University of Chicago, there was a campus comedy troupe modeled on Second City, their more well-known uptown uncle. The U of C group was pretty funny, if in a somewhat bookish way. (Who else does a comedy routine based on Oedipus Rex?) One of their funniest bits was a recurring skit about a superhero named Captain Obvious. In each scene, a character would face a mundane problem, only to be "saved" by the banal and utterly unhelpful advice offered by Captain Obvious. "I've locked my keys in my car. What am I going to do?" "Well then," replies Captain Obvious, "all you have to do is open the door to your car, and then you can get your keys." Each scene ended the same way, with Captain Obvious proclaiming, "No, don't thank me. It's all in a day's work for Captain Obvious.

I've been reminded of this skit many times since, because I frequently hear the same kind of advice being given in Washington. Take, for example, the recommendations offered today, to much fanfare, by the Iraq Study Group.

The problem in Iraq is that we can't withdraw US troops because the Iraqi military is not adequately trained to maintain security on its own? Well then, the ISG tells us, all we need to do is to train the Iraqi military so that they can maintain security on their own, and then we can withdraw our troops.

The problem in Iraq is that the Iraqi government won't approve a crackdown to dismantle the Shiite militias? Well then, all we have to do is to convince the Iraqi government to approve a crackdown to dismantle the Shiite militias.

The problem in Iraq is that Iran and Syria are arming, funding, and encouraging Sunni and Shiite insurgents? Well then, all we have to do is to convince Syria and Iran to stop supporting these insurgents.

The problem in the region is that the Palestinian-Israeli conflict inflames anti-American sentiment? Well then, all we have to do is to convene a conference to negotiate peace in the Middle East.

See how simple that was? It's amazing that no one ever thought of these ideas before the Iraq Study Group came along. But no, don't thank them. It's all in a day's work for Captain Obvious.

Few have recognized the empty banality of the ISG report because they have focused on a few seemingly radical recommendations. But all of these recommendations are conditional on events that are unlikely to happen, as became clear in Thursday's press conference with the members of the commission.

We should withdraw all US combat troops by early 2008, ISG co-chair Lee Hamilton tells us, "subject to unexpected developments on the ground"--such as the fact that the troops will still be needed. Similarly, we will shift troops from fighting the enemy to training the Iraqi military "if the commanders in place determine that's the best way to do it," according to commission member William Perry. Pressed on the subject of whether Iran would be willing to help us in Iraq, co-chair James Baker replies, "In our discussions with them--and the report points this out--we didn't get the feeling that Iran is champing at the bit to come to the table with us to talk about Iraq. And in fact, we say we think they very well might not."

There you have it: a series of recommendations based on conditions that "very well might not" happen.

The whole ISG report is a spectacular punt. It contains a few broad, vague goals for our policy--and a whole range of specific recommendations for actions that are not in the power of the American government to take. It recommends, for example, that the Iraqi government "accelerate assuming responsibility for Iraqi security by increasing the number and quality of Iraqi Army Brigades," that the Iranian government "use its influence over Iraqi Shiite groups to encourage national reconciliation" and that the Syrian government "stem the flow of funding, insurgents, and terrorists in and out of Iraq."

The members of the commission certainly hope that these governments will take those actions. But then again, they very well might not.

What the ISG offers us are mere aspirations, with no serious consideration of the concrete means required to fulfill those aspirations.

We should negotiate with Iran and Syria to convince them to help stabilize Iraq, but then James Baker angrily denies that this would mean caving in and allowing Iran to continue its nuclear weapons program, and he angrily denies that it would mean caving in and allowing Syria to re-conquer Lebanon. In other words, he wants to ask Iran and Syria to help us in Iraq--while ruling out the only concessions that might induce them to do so. At the same time, the ISG also rules out any serious military threat that would force Iran and Syria to abandon their current strategy.

This is the pattern of the whole report: to stipulate the achievement of a result, while denying the actual means that might achieve that result.

When you desire a result without enacting the means for achieving it, that's called a "fantasy"which is ironic, considering that James Baker is a dean of the "realist" school of foreign policy.

For the original Captain Obvious, the final punch-line comes when he rescues a philosopher who is struggling to prove that the world really exists--the one problem Captain Obvious is perfectly equipped to solve. Perhaps someone ought to provide the same service for the "realists" on the Iraq Study Group.

A real change in policy for Iraq wouldn't start and end with a collection of vague aspirations. It would start with a clear-eyed, realistic assessment of the facts that explain the chaos in Iraq--the facts that explain why all of the aspirations stated by the Iraq Study Group have not yet been met.

The basic fact is that the conflict in Iraq, from the very beginning, has been stoked by Syria and Iran. These dictatorial regimes are stoking the conflict because the success of the American mission in Iraq is an obvious threat to their very existence. They can't afford the example of a free nation in the region, nor can they afford the example of a successful exertion of American power on their doorsteps.

That's why all the debate over whether Iraq is in a "civil war" is beside the point. Calling Iraq a "civil war" has the effect of narrowing our focus, making the conflict look like a purely internal fight between Iraqi factions. But the real picture is regional. The civil strife in Iraq is just the instrument of a regional fight for dominance between Iran and the United States.

Recognizing this reality would produce some truly interesting and radical recommendations.

Since Iran and Syria are the most important source of the chaos in Iraq, then we need to topple those regimes. They won't agree to help us, because doing so does not and never will serve their interests. So we have to replace them with governments that do share our interests--or at least, with governments that will stay out of our way.

Then, since the Shiite militias are the leading edge of Iranian influence in Iraq, we have to act to dismantle them now--and not wait for approval from the Iraqi government. We should grasp that the Iraqi government's approval and disapproval on this issue simply doesn't matter, because if we don't take down the militias, there will be no Iraqi government left.

Instead of pointing to the bad results in Iraq and simply declaring that we must achieve better results--which is all that the ISG report really amounts to--we have to identify the real root of the problem: the regimes in Iran and Syria, and the Shiite militias they support. And then we need to dig up that root.

We'll know we're really making progress in talking about Iraq when that recommendation is seen as being as obvious as it really is.



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He claims post-tramatic stress diagnosis was ignored by Army

By Dean Baker of The Columbian
The Vancouver Columbian
June 16

Vancouver, Wash. A Vancouver soldier who saw more violence and bloodshed in Iraq than he could stand sat on his front porch in Rose Village on Thursday and said he won't go back to the war zone.

Instead, Army Pvt. Ryan Patrick Meeks, 22, has remained absent without leave since April 28.

"I tried to turn myself in," he said. "I went the right route, I thought. I showed the Army I was diagnosed with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), but they didn't even look at it. They just wanted to send me back to Iraq."

Meeks grew up in Vancouver and attended Heritage High School before earning his general education diploma and joining the Army in 2004. He said he learned last month from a psychologist that he suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder from seeing soldiers and Iraqis killed, and from coming close to being blown up himself by mortars and roadside bombs.

Meeks said he went with his father, Randy Meeks of Vancouver, to Fort Lewis on Memorial Day weekend and reported to military police. They gave him a bus ticket to his unit's home base, Fort Campbell, Ky. He got on the bus to Fort Campbell where officials said he'd have to return to Iraq to face a court martial.

He said he wasn't going back to Iraq. Instead, he got back on the bus and came home to Vancouver, he said. He returned home June 5, said his mother, Marcie Meeks of Vancouver.

The Army refused to keep him in the United States and help him deal with his anxiety, emotional instability, depression, anger and hypervigilance, Ryan Meeks said.

"They didn't even know what my mental status was," he said. "They didn't care. It's crazy."

Army officials at Fort Lewis, saying they were unaware of the specifics of Meeks' case, advised that any AWOL soldier should surrender to the Army and face his situation. Army officials at Fort Campbell didn't return a reporter's phone call.

"I don't know about this particular case," said Joe Hitt, a spokesman at Fort Lewis, "but the Army is committed to seeing that each and every soldier is treated with respect and to investigating each claim thoroughly."

Hitt said the Army would be unlikely to seek out any AWOL soldier, but that any police officer could arrest any soldier listed on a computer data base as AWOL

Police said they'd be unlikely to arrest any AWOL soldier unless he was stopped on suspicion of committing some other crime. In that case, police would run the soldier's identification through a computer network and find a federal AWOL warrant and make the arrest, they said.

Marcie Meeks said she hopes the Army will arrest her son and help him.

"We keep waiting for someone to do something," she said. "And they still haven't. They sent him home with no conditioning. They sent him home knowing he was not right."

She said she's worried about his mental condition and intimidated by his anger.

Meeks said he is willing to go to jail for being AWOL, but in the United States not if he has to go back to Camp Speicher at Tikrit, Iraq, where he served for eight months. He was a Humvee driver in the 101st Airborne Division (Air Assault).

"I don't know if you've been to Iraq, but it's not a nice place," he said. "And the jails aren't, either. ? I was defending my country, you know, and they are going to send me to prison in Iraq?

"It's a sticky situation. I been through the mortars and the roadside bombs, and now they want to send me back to spend my last months in the Army in a jail over there?" he said. "That isn't right."

Meeks, who is due for discharge from the Army in 2007, said he served 45 days in prison in Iraq after being found guilty of smoking marijuana along with two dozen other soldiers while they were still at Fort Campbell. He said that also was unfair because he felt he should have been tried in the United States.

Marcie Meeks said she is afraid for her son. "He is running scared," she said. "He's afraid they are going to shoot him or put him in jail for a long time."

But so far, neither she nor her son has heard a word from the Army.

Barbara Ferguson, Arab News


WASHINGTON, 21 June 2006 — The US Army has charged three US soldiers with the premeditated murder of three Iraqi detainees as well as with threatening the life of a fellow soldier who they feared would dispute their accounts of the deaths, military officials said Monday. The three Americans were identified as staff Sgt. Raymond L. Girouard, Spc. William B. Hunsaker and Pfc. Corey R. Clagett, all members of the 3rd Brigade of the 101st Airborne Division. They were charged accused of killing three males of “apparent Middle Eastern descent” at the Muthana Chemical Complex north of Baghdad by shooting them at close range, according to the official Army charges made public yesterday.

A murder conviction in the military carries the possibility of the death penalty.

The accused soldiers are being held in Kuwait, a Pentagon official said. Military officials first mentioned the investigation in a brief news release June 16.

But details of how the three soldiers shot the men have remained sketchy. In addition to murder, the soldiers were charged with conspiracy and with threatening another soldier. Military officials said the accused initially reported they shot the detainees while they were trying to flee, but that account was contradicted by a junior soldier who saw the shooting. The accused soldiers are charged with threatening to kill Mason on May 29, as the group was traveling from its own operating base to Camp Speicher, near Tikrit, where the Criminal Investigation Division has an office. Girouard is accused of threatening to kill Mason six different times in the weeks after the detainees died. Hunsaker is accused of threatening Mason four times, and Clagett twice.

The charges are the latest in a string of investigations into whether US forces have been responsible for the wrongful deaths of Iraqis, either in custody or during combat operations.

The most serious among them is a criminal investigation into whether Marines shot to death 24 civilians in the town of Haditha in November after they came under attack from a roadside bomb. In addition, seven other Marines and a Navy corpsman are being held at Camp Pendleton, Ca., in connection with the death of an Iraqi man in another town, Hamandiya. Since the start of the Iraq war, the military has brought criminal charges against at least 20 other service members in deaths of Iraqis. The military has not executed anyone since April 1961, but nine people are on death row, including a sergeant in the 101st Airborne who killed two officers and wounded 14 soldiers in Kuwait in March 2003.

Hey everyone please join! Just passing by does not do us any good, stop in and add your ideas.

Is it a good idea, is it good for our country, will they be a fierce enemy?

These are all questions we should be asking our selves. It seems a war with Iran could be right around the corner. Will this be the war that resets the growing population in the world?

Let us know what you think!

Two members of the 229th Engineer Unit of the Army National Guard were injured in Northern Iraq on Sunday when their 18-ton dump truck hit a land mine near a construction site. E4/SPC Jamee Buchen, the son of Terry and Pam Buchen of Wauzeka, fortunately was not seriously injured in the incident. Jamee's father, Terry Buchen, said they believe Jamee temporarily lost his hearing and injured his knee. The Buchen family three other sons who are stationed in Iraq with the 229th Ñ E4/SPC Chad Buchen, E4/SPC Rusty Smith and E4/SPC Jason Buchen. The four brothers are all in their early 20s. Buchen was a passenger in a 18-ton dump truck driven by John Scanlan, 29, of Benton. The dump truck, one of five in a convoy, struck a land mine near the construction site where they were working. Terry found out Jamee was injured when one of this brothers found out about the incident and called home. Terry said a brief call was made from a satellite phone. After a long, sleepless night on Sunday, he contacted the Prairie du Chien Armory and confirmed what had taken place. Terry added that his son that called said it was amazing was a land mine could do to a truck. He said he was told that Jamee returned to his unit, but Terry is not sure if he has returned to duty. This is the first time since the 229th went to Iraq that any soldiers have been injured a combat-type incident. During Operation Desert Storm, no soldiers were injured in combat. Terry has found the interest in the event a little overwhelming, with many newspapers and television stations contacting him. Terry said they pray and hope every day for the safety of their sons. He and Pam are very proud of the brothers. Jamee, Chad, Rusty and Jason do have contact on a regular basis. It was reported on the 229th Family Support Group's website (www.229th-family.com) that Scanlan suffered a broken leg. The Platteville Journal reported he had a broken foot, lacerations and a perforated eardrum. He was evacuated for Iraq more treatment. Scanlan's father told the Platteville Journal that John will be spending some time at a US base in Germany recuperating from his injuries and will return home to Benton sometime after that. Members of the 229th entered active duty on Feb. 7, left for Ft. McCoy on Feb. 10. They were at Ft. McCoy until May 29, when the went overseas. They have been based near Tikrit, in northern Iraq at Camp Speicher. The 229th has approximately 165 members, most of whom are from southwest Wisconsin and Northeast Iowa. Including the 32nd MP Company and 229th Engineer Company, the Wisconsin National Guard currently has 1,514 soldiers and airmen on active duty. Of those, about 950 are deployed overseas. Three soldiers of the 32nd Military Police company were injured in a separate attack on Sunday on an Iraqi police station in Baghdad. The nature and the extent of their injures could not be immediately confirmed, however they are not considered to be life-threatening and only one will require medical evacuation. The 32nd Military Police Company is headquartered in Milwaukee with a detachment in Madison. Five Wisconsin soldiers have lost their lives during the occupation of Iraq.

The way that I see the army in Iraq. I believe that the United States has done everything in its power to help the people of Iraq. That unfortunately is where it ends. The Army can only do so much, meaning we got rid of Saddam and the Army is continuing to get rid of the insurgents but its not enough. The people of Iraq also have to step up to plate and start showing the insurgents that they will no longer put up with the suicide bombings. In a recent article in the “Telegraph Herald” they said the religious leaders were beginning to denounce other religious fanatics from continuing to use suicide bombing as a way to get back at the US. This is a small step in the right direction. As the people of Iraq trust in Democracy, and support the new government, the quicker US soldiers can return home.

AAFES Opens Burger King, Pizza Hut for Troops in Tikrit September 24, 2004


DALLAS, Texas - Just days after opening Iraq's first Subway restaurant, Camp Speicher's Commanding General Brig. Gen. Stephen Mundt and soldiers of the 216th Engineers cut the ribbon to open the Army and Air Force Exchange Service's newest Burger King and Pizza Hut restaurants.

The Subway, Burger King and Pizza Hut are co-located to create a food court for troops in Tikrit.

"The response to the Subway was overwhelming," said AAFES Vice President of Food and Theater Richard Sheff. "The modest sandwich trailer generated more than $10,000 in sales in just its first two days of operation. Numbers like that reinforce to AAFES the troops' desire for name brand fast food wherever they are called to serve."

Both the Burger King and Pizza Hut have also been well received with combined opening day sales of more than $8,000. Take a seat at the food court at Camp Speicher and you'll quickly see how a cheeseburger, turkey sandwich or pepperoni pizza can quickly provide a needed morale boost to troops subject to conditions that are often harsh and austere. Military personnel visiting the AAFES food court smile and laugh as they taste a bit of home and relax over familiar meals with friends and co-workers.

The opening of the BK and Pizza Hut restaurants brings the total number of AAFES name brand fast food operations in Iraq to eight with four Burger Kings, three Pizza Huts and one Subway. The BK, Pizza Hut and Subway at Camp Speicher are the first three name brand fast food concepts of the 19 that have been approved for immediate development in Iraq. AAFES plans to open more than 50 name brand fast food facilities over the course of the next twelve months in Operation Iraqi Freedom.

Today I am writing to let everyone know that life in Iraq isn't all that bad. What I mean by that is this. Right now I am at a small base camp in Alaska. Well everyone would think that since it is part of the United
States that conditions would be pretty good. Well to tell you the truth this place has brought back alot of memories from Iraq except that everything over there was alot nicer from the food, to the weight rooms. Well that my small bit of thinking for the day.

Puddle of Mudd performs for troops at Camp Speicher in Iraq


By Lisa Burgess, Stars and Stripes
European edition, Tuesday, September 14, 2004



Lisa Burgess / S&S
Puddle of Mudd’s singer and guitarist, Wesley Scantlin, rocks the crowd at Camp Speicher Sunday night.


Lisa Burgess / S&S
Soldiers took advantage of every possible perch to get a good view of Puddle of Mudd during its Sunday night concert at Camp Speicher. Pfc Christopher Henson, 25, from Little Rock, Ark., and Company A of the 1st Infantry Division’s 601st Aviation Support Battalion claimed this seat.


Lisa Burgess / S&S
A crowd of 1,200 to 1,500 troops turned out to see Puddle of Mudd and the bands that preceded it Sunday night, according to event coordinator Sgt. 1st Class Shane Podraza.

CAMP SPEICHER, Iraq — Amid Iraq’s scorching, dry desert, fans of rock music were knee-deep in a Puddle of Mudd on Sunday night as the alternative rock group performed for troops at Camp Speicher.

At least 1,500 troops attended the concert, according to event coordinator Sgt. 1st Class Shane Podraza, liaison officer to the mayor’s cell at the camp. The show included a rousing opening session by the 1st Infantry Division’s own rock band.

Puddle of Mudd had played in Baumholder, Germany, on Friday as part of welcome home ceremonies for the 1st Armored Division before flying into Iraq for the Speicher concert and a meet-and-greet with Task Force Danger soldiers Monday.

The band went to Iraq when few big-name performers dare to venture into the active combat zone.

“The soldiers here are working really hard,” the band’s singer and guitarist, Wesley Scantlin, said. “They are keeping our nation safe. It seemed like the least we could do was to come out and play some music for them.”

Douglas Ardito, the group’s bass player, agreed.

“These are our buddies,” he said of the soldiers who were eagerly waiting to meet him Monday. “They are from the same towns we grew up in. They take risks with their lives; I figured we could take a risk, too.

“I felt we owed them.”

Besides, Scantlin added between signing autographs, “It’s something that most people in their lives will never be able to do.”

In addition to Scantlin and Ardito, Puddle of Mudd, which released its debut album in 2001, includes Paul Phillips on guitar and Greg Upchurch on drums.

There have been five concerts at Speicher’s stadium this summer, but Puddle of Mudd, whose trip was sponsored by Morale, Welfare and Recreation, AKA Productions, of Upland, Calif.; and Armed Forces Entertainment, “is by far the largest marquee name we’ve had,” said Podraza, 40, of Lincoln, Neb.

In fact, “it took me weeks to convince people [that such a popular band] was coming,” Podraza said Sunday as he prepared for the concert. “They thought it was a hoax.”

Spc. Braxton Cope, 43, of Mulberry Grove, Ill., said he could think of little else since he heard the band was coming to play.

“We’ve been looking forward to [the concert] ever since we heard about it two weeks ago,” said Cope, assigned to the 1st ID’s 454 Transport Company.

“They are so honest,” Cope said, holding a poster he hoped to have autographed. “There’s a lot of feeling in their music.”

The group will play one more concert for soldiers, in Friedburg, Germany, on Wednesday before returning to the United States.